The other day, I was listening to a customer talk about something she's been thinking about for a long time, but never heard herself actually say it. I asked her, "When was the last time you were able to be this open and unfiltered about what you want and how you feel?" She replied, "I’ve been saying this stuff all semester." I double checked to make sure she was being completely honest and asked if she was sure. She added, "Well, no. Maybe I’ve been thinking it, but this is the first time I’ve heard myself say it." I asked her how it made her feel to hear herself say everything. Here's what she had to say: "Honestly, it felt truthful. It felt honest. It felt relieving. Therapeutic? I don’t know." I responded by saying, "Sure. You just needed a listening ear, and someone who wasn’t going to judge you or drown you in a pool of opinions." One of the things she said after that was, "You did your job. You let me say everything without interrupting me. You don’t find listening ears like that just anywhere and everywhere. Thanks, Carrie."
Our customers love the ice cream treats, burgers, Melissa's famous onion rings, and building things in the sand in the Beach Room. However, I believe the thing the customers love the most about the Diary Dairy is that they know they'll find a listening ear, whether it comes in the form of an employee or their diary or journal. Everyone here is so good at listening to the customers without necessarily offering advice.
Melissa and the managers remind us constantly that we're not here to be a fountain of advice. We're not counselors or therapists. We're certainly not here to judge them or overwhelm them with our opinions on the matter. All of us are here to offer a listening ear because sometimes people just need to verbalize their feelings and desires without worrying about what others think about it.
You don't have to work at the Diary Dairy, or as a counselor in order to be a listening ear for someone. If a friend, family member, or someone you barely know wants to talk about something they're going through, don't be afraid to be there for them. You don't have to feel obligated to give advice or save them. If anything, a listening ear can be the best medicine because sometimes people just need to hear their thoughts out loud, and that can be a powerful experience. It can even be a rehearsal for when someone needs to say those things to the person to who needs to hear it the most. The kids love using us as a rehearsal for the things they have to tell their parents. College students rehearse with us before they meet with their professors. Parents will rehearse with Marilyn, Rhett, or Judy Bell what they have to tell their kids.
If you're the one who needs to do the talking, don't be afraid to tell someone you just need a listening ear. Whether you use one of the Diary Dairy employees, one of your friends, or one of your diaries, ask them (okay, so you don't need to ask your diary) to just simply listen.
And thank YOU for listening to me.
Carrie
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